Comments on: Losing friends and un-influencing people with the banjo http://banjosrule.com/blog/losing-friends-and-un-influencing-people-with-the-banjo/ Once I coodn't even spel bango pikker...now I are one! Tue, 09 Mar 2010 04:06:27 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: Jesse Taylor II http://banjosrule.com/blog/losing-friends-and-un-influencing-people-with-the-banjo/comment-page-1/#comment-509 Jesse Taylor II Tue, 01 Dec 2009 12:25:48 +0000 http://banjosrule.com/blog/?p=728#comment-509 I'm going to stand up for the other banjo player. Let's look at things from his point of view. First, his band has a gig to perform. It may not be a big paying gig, it may not pay anything at all, but it's a gig. People, family and friends plus strangers who might've heard good things about the featured artists, have cared enough to make the effort to come out and hear your performance. There may even be some strangers who need to be "turned on" to the sound this group has to offer. Instead of being able to take the stage and play to their audience, they're having to stand around and wait for one of their members to show up. It is extremely unprofessional of the missing member to make his bandmates, his friends, his fans and all the others, have to wait. It sends a bad message on behalf of the entire band, making them look bad to everyone concerned. Second, this may not have been the first time it's happened. It could be that this "no show man" cares very little for anyone other than himself. Of course, I'm willing to give the guy the benefit of a doubt. Accidents do happen and I hope the guy didn't have one. People do forget things, some folks more so than others. But, the way the banjo player walked out seems to signal that it wasn't the first time it ever happened. It wasn't the first time they've had trouble with the guy. I've been there. I've been one of the guys waiting for some arrogant, self-centered, "legend in his own mind" to do us the great honor of gracing us with his presence so the show can go on. It's never a good thing. Third, as a matter of sheer professionalism, a "performing band" must function as a whole unit...all for one and one for all. You work hard to put together a total sound...the very best you can accomplish...and that package hinges on every member of the band being present. Of course, any band needs to prepare itself for the possibility of having to perform without a full compliment, even if that means picking up a substitute member and dropping some of your more intricate material in favor of "moldy oldies", just to get through the show. In some instances, this may not be an option. Let's face it, some band members are more necessary than others. If that's the case, it's better to cancel the show than to go onstage and have a train wreck. Nobody wants the reputation of being a "no show", but that may be the lesser of two evils. You may be able to recover from a "no show" at your next gig and the folks who missed out on seeing you at the last show can still be "won over" once they hear what a great sound you have, but if you put out a bad show those folks won't bother to come to see you, next time. Plus, the man paying you might not hire you back. That bad show really may have been your last show. The other banjo player may have had enough sense to know that. So, you see, a lot hinges on the decisions made in such a situation. The other banjo player may have done the right thing by walking out. I don't believe it was because he was intimidated by a better artist, or by a group of better artists. He may have made the decision out of nothing more than frustration that had been building within his own group over a period of time. Jamming with other artists is a good thing. It's fun and it's a learning experience. Most people enjoy it and join in whole heartedly. When all you guys decided to salvage the evening by jamming together that decision was really the only option left. Maybe that decision should've been made earlier. Maybe the other banjo player might have joined in if it had. Maybe nobody really had enough experience in dealing with such a situation to make that desicion. Maybe the best thing about the experience was the "gaining of experience". I hope someone remembers it and learns something from it and is able to pull the evening together a little faster, next time. Of course, I really hope there isn't a next time. I've been there. When you reach a certain level of "performance ability", you realize people expect certain things from you. If you're any kind of person at all, you want to meet those expectations. You become "professional", both in your actions and in your intentions and expectations of yourself. Failure isn't an option. What would I have done? Well, after waiting around so long that another group of musicians got so bored with the proceedings, or lack there of, that they took the stage...if I had been able, I'd have walked out and turned over the show to someone more willing and capable of performing than my band mates seemed to be. It seems to be the honorable thing to do for an audience. -Jesse I’m going to stand up for the other banjo player. Let’s look at things from his point of view.
First, his band has a gig to perform. It may not be a big paying gig, it may not pay anything at all, but it’s a gig. People, family and friends plus strangers who might’ve heard good things about the featured artists, have cared enough to make the effort to come out and hear your performance. There may even be some strangers who need to be “turned on” to the sound this group has to offer. Instead of being able to take the stage and play to their audience, they’re having to stand around and wait for one of their members to show up. It is extremely unprofessional of the missing member to make his bandmates, his friends, his fans and all the others, have to wait. It sends a bad message on behalf of the entire band, making them look bad to everyone concerned.
Second, this may not have been the first time it’s happened. It could be that this “no show man” cares very little for anyone other than himself. Of course, I’m willing to give the guy the benefit of a doubt. Accidents do happen and I hope the guy didn’t have one. People do forget things, some folks more so than others. But, the way the banjo player walked out seems to signal that it wasn’t the first time it ever happened. It wasn’t the first time they’ve had trouble with the guy. I’ve been there. I’ve been one of the guys waiting for some arrogant, self-centered, “legend in his own mind” to do us the great honor of gracing us with his presence so the show can go on. It’s never a good thing.
Third, as a matter of sheer professionalism, a “performing band” must function as a whole unit…all for one and one for all. You work hard to put together a total sound…the very best you can accomplish…and that package hinges on every member of the band being present.
Of course, any band needs to prepare itself for the possibility of having to perform without a full compliment, even if that means picking up a substitute member and dropping some of your more intricate material in favor of “moldy oldies”, just to get through the show.
In some instances, this may not be an option. Let’s face it, some band members are more necessary than others. If that’s the case, it’s better to cancel the show than to go onstage and have a train wreck. Nobody wants the reputation of being a “no show”, but that may be the lesser of two evils. You may be able to recover from a “no show” at your next gig and the folks who missed out on seeing you at the last show can still be “won over” once they hear what a great sound you have, but if you put out a bad show those folks won’t bother to come to see you, next time. Plus, the man paying you might not hire you back. That bad show really may have been your last show. The other banjo player may have had enough sense to know that.
So, you see, a lot hinges on the decisions made in such a situation. The other banjo player may have done the right thing by walking out. I don’t believe it was because he was intimidated by a better artist, or by a group of better artists. He may have made the decision out of nothing more than frustration that had been building within his own group over a period of time.
Jamming with other artists is a good thing. It’s fun and it’s a learning experience. Most people enjoy it and join in whole heartedly. When all you guys decided to salvage the evening by jamming together that decision was really the only option left.
Maybe that decision should’ve been made earlier. Maybe the other banjo player might have joined in if it had. Maybe nobody really had enough experience in dealing with such a situation to make that desicion. Maybe the best thing about the experience was the “gaining of experience”. I hope someone remembers it and learns something from it and is able to pull the evening together a little faster, next time.
Of course, I really hope there isn’t a next time. I’ve been there. When you reach a certain level of “performance ability”, you realize people expect certain things from you. If you’re any kind of person at all, you want to meet those expectations. You become “professional”, both in your actions and in your intentions and expectations of yourself. Failure isn’t an option.
What would I have done? Well, after waiting around so long that another group of musicians got so bored with the proceedings, or lack there of, that they took the stage…if I had been able, I’d have walked out and turned over the show to someone more willing and capable of performing than my band mates seemed to be. It seems to be the honorable thing to do for an audience.
-Jesse

]]> By: saphine http://banjosrule.com/blog/losing-friends-and-un-influencing-people-with-the-banjo/comment-page-1/#comment-489 saphine Sun, 22 Nov 2009 10:27:00 +0000 http://banjosrule.com/blog/?p=728#comment-489 Aw gee Paul. I'm just a grown up I guess! Could say the same for you re being around here. Let me know anytime you visit Inverness, I'll buy you a pint (milk if you don't drink alcohol!) Aw gee Paul. I’m just a grown up I guess! Could say the same for you re being around here. Let me know anytime you visit Inverness, I’ll buy you a pint (milk if you don’t drink alcohol!)

]]> By: admin http://banjosrule.com/blog/losing-friends-and-un-influencing-people-with-the-banjo/comment-page-1/#comment-486 admin Fri, 20 Nov 2009 16:26:12 +0000 http://banjosrule.com/blog/?p=728#comment-486 Wow Elizabeth, you have a great attitude! How come you aren't around here so we can pick with more people like you? :) Wow Elizabeth, you have a great attitude! How come you aren’t around here so we can pick with more people like you? :)

]]> By: admin http://banjosrule.com/blog/losing-friends-and-un-influencing-people-with-the-banjo/comment-page-1/#comment-485 admin Fri, 20 Nov 2009 16:25:06 +0000 http://banjosrule.com/blog/?p=728#comment-485 Wow Phill, your story is even more surprising than mine! That's really something. Wow Phill, your story is even more surprising than mine! That’s really something.

]]> By: admin http://banjosrule.com/blog/losing-friends-and-un-influencing-people-with-the-banjo/comment-page-1/#comment-484 admin Fri, 20 Nov 2009 16:24:12 +0000 http://banjosrule.com/blog/?p=728#comment-484 Hey Steve, actually their mandolin player played with me and Foose first, then when the three of us were done they encouraged me and Eric and Foose to do our thing, kind of like an opening act, while they waited on their 4th guy. Once the banjo player stormed out, we actually did all pick together, so it turned out fun in spite of him Hey Steve, actually their mandolin player played with me and Foose first, then when the three of us were done they encouraged me and Eric and Foose to do our thing, kind of like an opening act, while they waited on their 4th guy. Once the banjo player stormed out, we actually did all pick together, so it turned out fun in spite of him

]]> By: saphine http://banjosrule.com/blog/losing-friends-and-un-influencing-people-with-the-banjo/comment-page-1/#comment-483 saphine Thu, 19 Nov 2009 17:56:51 +0000 http://banjosrule.com/blog/?p=728#comment-483 Most people have off days ..some of the time. Some people fail to communicate their views and feelings...most of the time. If only most people were honest and open most of the time...at least some people would be aware of what's going on. Failure to communicate! What's wrong with saying ' hey, I feel a wee bit hacked off' or 'I'm having a lousy day' or whatever it is that mentioning would sort the issue out? I'll bet the guy who walked out feels a bit of a NUMPTY but his pride and shame will not let him admit to it. There again...some ego's are just too huge for other mortals to deal with and it's probably better they leave and take their behaviour with them. Sounds like a great night despite the behaviour of a grown 2yr old. Elizabeth Most people have off days ..some of the time.
Some people fail to communicate their views and feelings…most of the time.
If only most people were honest and open most of the time…at least some people would be aware of what’s going on.
Failure to communicate! What’s wrong with saying ‘ hey, I feel a wee bit hacked off’ or ‘I’m having a lousy day’ or whatever it is that mentioning would sort the issue out?
I’ll bet the guy who walked out feels a bit of a NUMPTY but his pride and shame will not let him admit to it.
There again…some ego’s are just too huge for other mortals to deal with and it’s probably better they leave and take their behaviour with them.
Sounds like a great night despite the behaviour of a grown 2yr old.
Elizabeth

]]> By: PhillGibson http://banjosrule.com/blog/losing-friends-and-un-influencing-people-with-the-banjo/comment-page-1/#comment-482 PhillGibson Wed, 18 Nov 2009 02:02:57 +0000 http://banjosrule.com/blog/?p=728#comment-482 Hey Paul, The only time I had such a moment like that it also left me rather confused and wondering what happened. I kind of was no longer invited to practice with my band at the time! I never really figured out exactly why, but I figure it was either because I had missed a practice (only one, mind you), or else it was because I tend to like playing more progressive stuff (in addition to tradional stuff) which someone must not have liked. Guess I'll never really know... :( Hey Paul,

The only time I had such a moment like that it also left me rather confused and wondering what happened. I kind of was no longer invited to practice with my band at the time! I never really figured out exactly why, but I figure it was either because I had missed a practice (only one, mind you), or else it was because I tend to like playing more progressive stuff (in addition to tradional stuff) which someone must not have liked. Guess I’ll never really know… :(

]]> By: Robes http://banjosrule.com/blog/losing-friends-and-un-influencing-people-with-the-banjo/comment-page-1/#comment-479 Robes Mon, 16 Nov 2009 21:26:54 +0000 http://banjosrule.com/blog/?p=728#comment-479 "You know what? Bull&*^%…" Such language for a banjo player,... you should have your mouthed washed out with Fast Fret ........:-) “You know what? Bull&*^%…”
Such language for a banjo player,… you should have your mouthed washed out with Fast Fret ……..:-)

]]> By: Robes http://banjosrule.com/blog/losing-friends-and-un-influencing-people-with-the-banjo/comment-page-1/#comment-478 Robes Mon, 16 Nov 2009 21:25:07 +0000 http://banjosrule.com/blog/?p=728#comment-478 "Pontificating"... oh,... using them dollar fifty words ... Maybe he was just having a really really bad day,... and sometimes rather than blow up,.. it's easier to leave. Give him some time, you might find out he feels bad about the whole situation too. But,... in reading your blog, I share your feelings. You did nothing wrong as you were encouraged to play...and they were waiting for their "4th". Not sure of the rules and regs of jamming yet, but any reason they couldn't have jumped up and played with you guys? “Pontificating”… oh,… using them dollar fifty words …
Maybe he was just having a really really bad day,… and sometimes rather than blow up,.. it’s easier to leave. Give him some time, you might find out he feels bad about the whole situation too. But,… in reading your blog, I share your feelings. You did nothing wrong as you were encouraged to play…and they were waiting for their “4th”. Not sure of the rules and regs of jamming yet, but any reason they couldn’t have jumped up and played with you guys?

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